Showing posts from February, 2012

I am..


the mechanics of self doubt..



A feeling of restlessness seems to have overcome me of late, listlessly watching the seconds on the clock tick as I do next to nothing. Books lie piled up in assorted stacks on my table, abandoned and ignored, chiding me with their silent stares. They must know too that I will regret this later.

I had such a haunting dream the other night. I was in Goa, with my mother and some relatives. There was parasailing and there was boating in what looked like a lake. There we were, my mother and I in this boat. I kept seeing my old friends boating around too. I would wave to them, and we would exchange pleasantries.

The place was beautiful, there were island cliffs on all sides much like what I had seen months ago in Halong bay. The lake seemed to be part of some of a zoo too. There were penguins perched on some of the rocks which jutted on the surface of the lake. I seemed to be feeling anxious, my camera was with one of the others who was not on our boat. When I finally managed to find it, …

My morning jam

This morning, I stumbled upon 'Our Version of Events', an album by Emili Sande.. It has been on repeat ever since.. In particular, this soulful song called River..

If you're lookin' for the big adventure,
And gold is all that's on your mind,
If you want someone to take your picture,
Then I won't waste your time

See maybe I'm too quiet for you,
You probably never noticed me,
But if you're too big to follow rivers,
How you ever gonna find the seas

So follow me, I'll be your river river,
I'll do the running for ya, follow me,
I'll be your river river, I'll move the mountains for ya,
Follow me, I'll be your river river,
I'm here to keep you flowing, follow me,
I'll be your river river, river river, yea

If all you want are answers to your questions,
And you can't seem to find the love, the free,
You're lookin' for the right deriction,
And darling look for me

See, I can't make the loan much l…

A song that speaks my heart and mind..

Breakaway - Kelly Clarkson

As kids, we all have in us dreams of the things we wish to achieve in life- we are hopeful and we are fearless.. We all need a sense of belonging, of being a part of something incredible, and more importantly being incredible ourselves.. We all would want to take chances and challenge ourselves, but often fear and self doubt gets in the way and makes us settle for things..

This is why I love this song, and the message it delivers.. We all want to breakaway, to make wishes, take chances and make a change in the world..

Grew up in a small town 
And when the rain would fall down 
I'd just stare out my window 
Dreamin' of what could be 
And if I'd end up happy 
I would pray 

Trying hard to reach out 
But when I tried to speak out 
Felt like no one could hear me 
Wanted to belong here 
But something felt so wrong here 
So I prayed I could breakaway 

I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly 
I'll do what it takes till I touch the sky 
And I'll m…
There is a certain melancholy that fills us sometimes, Something that creeps on us through our laughter..


We walk amidst them all, Safe in our opaque cocoons, Which hides in it, The essence of us.

it's all gone

And just like that, the snow melted away, leaving behind no traces of it on my window and the roof.
Oh how I wished it had stayed on more.
How I wish I had stayed up all night,
Watching it swirl and swoon outside my window,
Before deciding to settle on the glass,
Forming patterns before trickling down onto the ledge.
But alas, it is all gone,
If it were not for the remnants of slush on the ground below,
I would think it was all but a dream.

snow snow snow





Camden Town, London.