The world has its ways
The world has its ways of making people feel small, almost insignificant. We set out to do something, may even manage to do it, and look up in pride and joy wishing to be appreciated and Bam!, we see someone else's work, so much better, prettier, artistic.. It makes us feel small all over again. My father always told me, "Envy is the worst emotion. Never envy someone." But this jealousy and envy that sometimes rises like a tide deep inside won't go easily. There is an inextinguishable thirst in me to do something no one else has, to take a picture which speaks more than just a thousand words, to write a piece which sums up the answer to questions of the world, to get top grades in my class, to prove myself to the world. And each time someone else does it, I feel an uncontrollable twang of pain, guilt, a feeling of 'if-only'.. I know we are meant to appreciate the good things in the world, in fact I do, but I always find myself wishing I had done something, that I could do something.. And through all this, I guess I have found a purpose in life- to find beauty in this world, and to try and add to the beauty with something beautiful of my own. ;)
Indeed just being born as a human is just like to catch one of stars in the sky. If compared to animals, insects, or bacterias, humans are in much greater position.
ReplyDeleteEnvy can be manifested in two ways:
First, you want the person who is more sucessful than you to be lowered.
Second, you want to improve yourself, so that you would catch up the person who is more sucessful than you.
I am sure you don't want the person more sucessful than you to be lowered in terms of academic performance. Just imagine, there are many many sucessful people we don't know, but we don't envy them because we don't know about them. However we envy those whom we know (classmates etc). So if we don't envy those whom we don't know, then there is no need to envy those whom we know, because it will make no difference and we cannot influence their academic or professional performance by our will, it is independent from our will. But instead try to identify what mistakes you did, and then just fix it whether on your own effort or by observing others who are more (or even less) sucessful than you. A good mark can be also subjective depending on the teacher's background. I hope it helps
was just thinking the same then BAM!! "a purpose in life- to find beauty in this world, and to try and add to the beauty with something beautiful of my own" ;D
ReplyDeleteThanks ;D keep writing :)
I feel envious in the sense that I wish that I had done what they did.. I want to improve myself and do great things. That is what this article and in fact, this blog is about.
ReplyDelete